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Jul. 25th, 2017 09:08 am
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[personal profile] the_rck
My sleep was only middling last night. I was stressed out at bedtime and didn't end up turning out the light until much later than usual because I wanted to unwind a bit. I used the c-PAP for part of the night. It had been my intention to use it all night, but I took it off in the middle of the night. I don't know why. I remember doing it and that it seemed important to do so, but I can't remember why.

I decided to make use of being up early to do a chore that I've been putting off for months. I pulled all of the books I've already read off the shelves in bedroom (two shopping bags filled to the top) and consolidated the other books as much as I could. I've dusted some of the shelves. I don't know that the dust quite made it to the dust bunny stage, but I at least had dust mice.

I want to clear enough space that I can have one shelf for library books. Having them in six different places isn't conducive to remembering to read them. I also want space for my thumb splints and some place level to land my laptop over night when I've been using it in there before bed.

I need to figure out what to do with the jigsaw puzzles. I like puzzles, but we don't really have a place for me to do them. Setting up a card table isn't really feasible for space reasons, not unless I'm going to finish the puzzle in a single afternoon while I'm home alone.

Scott scheduled today as a vacation day so that he could deal with two medical appointments. The way work schedules things, that means he has tonight off. Their book keeping considers third shift to be on the day that it starts rather than on the day it ends. This is partly so they can say that third shift works M-F instead of Tu-Sa. At any rate, his first appointment is at 11 and the second at either 2 or 3. Right now, the plan is for him to shower and then try to nap for an hour before the first appointment.

We need to wash Scott's work clothes today, and I'd like to change the sheets and run a load of laundry for us and maybe for Cordelia. I need to shower, too, and I'd like to nap if I can. Oh, and it's trash day. Great fun.

Tomorrow, my parents will be in town briefly because my step-father has an appointment about that growth in his eye. They suggested that we go to lunch. I'm pretty sure that they were hoping to see Cordelia, but they never did much to build a relationship with her, so she's got zero interest. She'd go along if she had nothing else going on, but she's not going to skip part of her volunteering in order to see them.

Scott gave me a ride to and from my appointment yesterday. I wouldn't have asked, but I was feeling really miserable due to cramping. He took the opportunity to pick up an interlibrary loan book that had come in for Cordelia.

My psychiatrist suggested that I try to find some sort of online, at home work to earn money to help while we're financially strapped. I'm looking at that as a huge can of worms. There's not a lot I'm able to do because of not being able to commit to regular hours or even to a set number in a week. Also, most of the online work options aren't things I'd be good at or aren't things that my anxiety would permit.

I'm also concerned about the possibility that earning money, even sporadically, might affect my disability status with either Social Security or my long term disability insurance through my former employer. The LTD insurer is always looking for any hint that I might not be disabled. I might be able to work for a while before I wrecked myself, and that might well be long enough to lose the LTD insurance payments and the medical insurance that goes along with the money.

My writing might be marketable, but I think that would wreck me, too, because there'd need to be a lot of it, and I'd need to figure out how to sell it and work at making sure that people saw it and... I'd stay awake all night worrying that I had or hadn't done something that would just wreck everything. Also, the sort of writing that might bring in money within any sort of helpful time frame would likely be some sort of ebook porn short stories. I can write porn. Sometimes. I can even write it quickly. Sometimes. I just... I write dark and complicated, and sometimes, I can't write at all for days or even weeks.

My psychiatrist also said that, if I'm still exhausted the next time I see her, we can talk about stimulants because insurers will cover them for people with sleep apnea who have been using a c-PAP for at least two months. I'm not entirely optimistic. Provigil (modafinil) didn't help me at all, and I suspect that caffeine has more of a psychological effect for me than a physiological one. Well, if I've recently had caffeine, sleeping is harder because I have to get up to pee every twenty minutes, but I'm not sure that counts.

It's frustrating that she's the only medical professional I'm dealing with who understands that the things that the other doctors are worried about all derive at least in part from fatigue/exhaustion and from anxiety and pain making sleep difficult. And each of those things makes all of the others worse.

I did some edits on my second Pod Together fic yesterday, all things that my partner requested. I'm hoping that the changed text will be easier to read. I still need to do one check on the pronunciation of the name of a minor character. I think I remember how it was pronounced, but I don't want to rely on that.

I also wrote about four hundred words on chapter 7 of Auguries of Innocence. I need to go back to the early part of the chapter to lay some groundwork for the things that just occurred to me as necessary. It's all about a character who hasn't been in any of the previous chapters, so I don't need to tweak anything earlier in the story. (This is an advantage of using point of view characters who don't think the way that most people do, Draco because he's unmoored in time, and Luna because she never did.)

icons: Galavant

Jul. 24th, 2017 04:17 pm
meganbmoore: (hogfather: susan: sword)
[personal profile] meganbmoore
139 x Galavant



here )

(no subject)

Jul. 24th, 2017 09:01 am
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
I slept last night, but it wasn't great. A big part of that was cramps. Scott's still in bed. I don't know if I woke him when my alarm went off. I got it off in about two seconds, but who knows? That would wake me, but he often doesn't wake for my weekend medication alarms which have a similar duration. Scott came to bed about 4:30. I woke up about then because I really needed the bathroom and was just getting up when he went in there. Which, well, isn't that how it always works?

I managed to use the c-pap all night, though.

I'm a little cranky that, although he stayed up past when it was done drying, he didn't bring up the laundry. I really don't want to face the stairs right now, but that is my only source of clean clothing unless I'm willing to wake Scott.

My month to date word count is 21752. That's the highest for any month so far this year, even if I write nothing else whatsoever. Yesterday, I added about 1300 words to my Captive Audience fic and then realized I may need to make a major alteration in the setting. I'm hoping not, though. Today's writing will mostly be tweaks to the second of my Pod Together stories to try to make the rhythm of certain passages work better for the person doing the podfic.

We were surprised when we went downtown to the library yesterday afternoon-- Apparently Art Fair now includes Sunday. For as long as I can remember, Sunday was tear down and clean up, but one of the employees at the library told me that Sunday's been part of actual Art Fair for a couple of years now.

We stopped by the science and nature center to do some Ingress, and we took back the portals that someone from the other side had captured. We had planned to go into the woods to reinforce the two portals there, but we decided against it because of the risk of ticks. The other portals are all accessible from places that should be much lower risk for ticks (close cropped grass or asphalt). We'll hope no one knocks out those two portals for a while. It can be done from the street because high level bursters have a pretty extensive reach. The portals just can't be captured from there because one has to be much closer in order to place resonators and mods.

I told Scott that we should hope for the other side coming by frequently. He's close to leveling up, and recapturing a portal is worth a fair number of points.

(no subject)

Jul. 23rd, 2017 10:45 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
Counting as yet unrevealed fics, I now have a bit more than 660k words of fic on AO3. I boggle at the number. How on Earth is that possible?

I haven't heard from either of the people I'm working with for Pod Together. I'd mainly like to know if what I wrote works for them and if there are things I could do to make it work better.

I really ought to be asleep, but I can't seem to relax. The fact that Scott has to stay up to try to shift his sleep schedule isn't helping.

Fic Announcements

Jul. 23rd, 2017 02:50 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
Authors have been revealed for the Nonconathon, so I can claim the five stories I wrote. I'm putting the list and information about the stories behind a cut because of the subject matter. If you click through, please mind the tags. I wrote one Weiss Kreuz, one Star Trek Original Series (Mirror Universe), and three original fics. I think the Weiss Kreuz story is the only one for which I didn't fall down the world building rabbit hole.

All of these are explicit.

The fic descriptions and links )

(no subject)

Jul. 23rd, 2017 12:21 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
I'm 1700 words into my Captive Audience story. It's not due until 2 September, but I can already tell that it's likely to be long, so I guess having that time is good. I think this one will flow better during the writing than the second Pod Together story did. I might still hit a snag, but I'm hoping not.

My period finally started today after almost a month of off and on spotting. On the plus side, this makes having one on the 7th of August when I go in for the uterine ultrasound a lot less likely.

Scott's going to be working third shift this week and, probably, next. He originally thought that next week was his vacation, but I pointed out that that's actually another week further on. The only reason they didn't tell him to work third shift next week was that he told them he'd be on vacation. He emailed his boss to tell him of the error as soon as I told him (Scott didn't have access to his calendar right then). Third shift is down to four out of seven employees, and two of those left are supervisors who aren't supposed to run machines apart from covering for lunches and breaks. At other times, they move from machine to machine, making sure that everything's going okay and helping with whatever problem they judge most urgent.

Neither our nephew nor our niece were at the family gathering yesterday, so it was Cordelia and six adults. She retreated to the basement after dinner to read her book in isolation. I think she felt that four hours of being polite to adults was plenty.

I ended up sitting in the living room with Scott's father while Cordelia was in the basement and everyone else was out on the sun porch playing Ticket to Ride Europe. I didn't think it would be a good thing for us to sit in silence, so I initiated conversation, and we talked until the folks playing the game came back in. At that point, it was 9:00, and we were all ready to go home.

(no subject)

Jul. 22nd, 2017 10:02 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
I want very much to respond to comments on some fics that are still anonymous. I could respond anonymously, but reveals are tomorrow, and I'd rather respond as myself. I've gotten recipient comments on four of the five stories, and the fifth person hasn't responded to any of the three stories they got but appears to have been prompt about responding to past gifts, so I'm assuming some sort of offline life thing has happened.

We're on our way home from Scott's parents' place now. If we weren't, I'd start the next story with a due date.
meganbmoore: (flower in prison: scenery)
[personal profile] meganbmoore
I've been watching the 2011 sageuk Tree With Deep Roots, which is a political thriller about the creation of Hangul, which Six Flying Dragons is a prequel to. Tree should be watched before 6FD though. My first “I wish I’d watched this while it was airing” moment with it was the fight at the end of episode 7/beginning of episode 8. Because while I recognize that the flying/mid-air clashing effects were fairly advanced and cutting edge for 2011, they are…very dated, especially since I watched and rewatched the more advanced versions of that technology in Gil Dong and Mori’s fights in Rebel: Thief Who Stole the People earlier this year.



Speaking of Rebel, as I’ve been discussing with @dingax, who I’m watching Tree with, Tree is almost an inversion of Rebel. Or more accurately, Rebel is an inversion of Tree.



spoilers for both series )

(no subject)

Jul. 22nd, 2017 01:25 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
I managed to finish the [community profile] pod_together fic last night about 11:00. I haven't posted it yet because it lacks a title. I'm also still hoping to hear back from my partner in the undertaking, but we're not in compatible time zones, so it's difficult.

I also need a tag that I can use for when a character talks to an externalized manifestation of their own psyche in order to hash out a problem. There must be one, right? Any suggestions?

I woke with a migraine this morning. I think it's a multi-factor thing. I slept less last night than I wanted to because Scott took forever (two hours!) getting ready for bed after I was ready to sleep. Then, when he came to bed, he kept doing stuff with his laptop until I asked him why he was still up and still keeping me up. I had some coughing, so I didn't dare use the c-PAP. I was stressed about the story and about the family gathering this afternoon (BIL's birthday), and a number of other things. There's also some indication that my body may be preparing for a period (though I'm skeptical because been spotting off and on since late June. If I didn't already have a gynecology appointment on the 9th, I'd probably have called already to see about setting one up).

The lack of sleep and stress are making me ache. I'm wearing thumb splints today because I can't do what I need to otherwise. I have to wrap the present for our BIL some time in the next half hour (Scott's trying to repair the dryer). We only have Christmas wrapping paper.

What I really want to do is to lie down and nap. There just isn't time.
alias_sqbr: (happy dragon)
[personal profile] alias_sqbr
Remix Revival 2017 A fanart/fanfic remix exchange with signups closing on the 30th. I think this is the first panfandom remix exchange allowing both, I'm pretty excited!

[community profile] drawesome A fanart community that has had some fun prompts

Let's Make Games and Drink Responsibly: A gathering for people in the local games community, it was a lot of fun and I had some really interesting and inspiring conversations. Cam came along and it was perfect for him, as someone who is really interested in discussing and making games but isn't working on anything right now. Also Scott Ludlum was there! (I was too shy to talk to him but he said he was happy to be among friends, which was nice to see) It's apparently going to be monthly, best way to follow it right now is probably the Let's Make Games Facebook group.

(no subject)

Jul. 21st, 2017 12:31 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
Scott's response on giving away the crock pot was "Hallelujah!!" We just have to figure out an easy way to transport it. Our cleaning lady is thinking that she'll bring a sturdy bag and take one piece a week. I think the base the lid are light enough to go together, but the stoneware inserts are really, really heavy.

I ended up not writing yesterday. The afternoon and early evening got devoured by insurance related stuff. There's a receipt I can't find that I'm about 60% sure I submitted for a claim, but I can't find any indication on the Aetna statements that they ever got it. I also haven't managed to find it in any of the places I keep those receipts.

Then, while we were eating dinner, our power went out for about an hour and a half. Scott and I decided to go out in search of some sort of dessert, but the first place we tried had too long a wait for seating. The second had already closed for the evening. We went to Plum Market for the half price baked goods and then ended up at Wendy's for frosties. After we had paid, they handed them to us with straws, telling us that they were out of spoons and that, if we really wanted, they could give us forks instead of straws.

Cordelia's pediatrician told me that I will have to talk to the sports medicine people about guidelines for what she can safely do in gym class. I really hope they don't need to see her in order to do that because there's pretty much zero chance that they could see her for that before October, not the way non-emergency appointments go at the U.

(no subject)

Jul. 21st, 2017 12:30 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
I'm looking for suggestions for story idea generators that might appeal to Cordelia. She says she wants to write but has no ideas. Anything I suggest is, naturally, too parentally tainted to be interesting, so I thought maybe some of those generators that slap ridiculous ideas together might help.

I don't play with them much, so I have no idea what's out there or how to find them.

(no subject)

Jul. 21st, 2017 02:39 pm
elle_white: (Sunset)
[personal profile] elle_white
I realised the one thing that makes Equestria Girls better than its parent franchise when it comes to reformation, is that Equestria Girls puts a big emphasis on personal responsibility. You have to own what you've done and honestly want to do better in future.

It was a huge part of Sunset's arc, and she won't have problems forgiving someone if they show genuine remorse. Cinch is so terrible because she's an older woman who takes absolutely no personal responsibility for using and manipulating the children in her care. 

Personal responsibility and the desire to change for the better is often glossed over in FiM. Starlight feeling honest remorse wasn't crucial to her being given a second chance, and that was one of the major issues with it. 

The running theme of Equestria Girls is actively trying to do better, and getting their with the help of friends. FiM doesn't have that kind of depth to it, which is why redemption doesn't work as well in FiM. 

(no subject)

Jul. 20th, 2017 03:39 pm
the_rck: (Default)
[personal profile] the_rck
I'm feeling so very, very overheated right now. I know that part of the problem is that the only way I can get caffeine right this moment is by making and drinking hot tea (cold brewed will take about twenty hours, so it's not an immediate option). Well, I could spend a couple of hours going to the store to buy something. Decidedly not worth it to.

I'm at home alone right this moment. Cordelia had a volunteer shift at the downtown library this morning and plans to meet up with friends at the Traverwood library in the afternoon. She'll go home with them, and we'll pick her up at 9:30, after movie night with her friends. Their current plan is to watch Grease.

A couple of nights ago, I cooked the remaining ground turkey in the instant pot with some great northern beans and turkey bacon. I added chicken broth and some herbs/spices. I think I misjudged that because it almost gives me reflux. It doesn't actually; I can just tell that I'm near the tipping point.

I've managed the two most urgent phone calls, but neither matter is resolved yet. The second call is almost certainly going to end up with me having to call a different doctor's office about parameters/limitations for Cordelia's knee in high school gym. I was hoping not to have to because that's the doctor that wanted us to do surgery. The first call went to voicemail, so nothing's resolved until I actually manage to talk to the person.

The other call I should make is to Shar Instruments to ask about buying a viola and whether or not we can do it on installments. Of course, buying a viola kind of requires us to be fairly sure Cordelia's done growing. She's only grown half an inch in the last year and a half, and she's in the height range where all the women in my family tend to fall (5'1 to 5'3"). It's just that everyone in Scott's family is tall, so Cordelia's still hoping she'll get taller.

I'm trying to decide whether filling out insurance forms is more important than starting to write right this moment. My procrastination levels are set to 11 at the moment. The forms are important, very much so, but would there be any harm in having Scott fill the dratted things out this evening?

I have given our old crock pot to our cleaning lady. She'll actually use it, and we haven't touched it in years. The stoneware inserts are really too heavy for me at this point. I don't think this is the sort of thing that's worth holding onto for the years until Cordelia moves out and might want it. Plus, I'm pretty sure she'd rather have an Instant Pot instead.

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